All over the place and a little bit of everything this week, going from unnecessary sequels, gory remakes, creature features, to stone cold classics and more. Read or don't!

Films watched between Monday 09/01/2023 and Sunday 15/01/2023.

Monday 09/01/2023
Scare Package II: Rad Chad's Revenge (2022)

Director: Alexandra Barreto, Anthony Cousins, Aaron B. Koontz, Jed Shepherd, Rachele Wiggins

It's rare that I come across a movie that I actively start to hate during its runtime and rare still that I become hateful towards movies anyway, but fuck me this was a right mess. I'm sorry, I got a lot of love for anthology movies; horror or otherwise, but this gets worse with each segment and the wraparound was teetering on complete nonsense. Add it to the "wholly unnecessary sequels" list and swiftly move on. The first Scare Package (2019) was watchable, not outstanding; it had one or two interesting segments and wasn't entirely unlikeable. It was middling, bordering on tedious, but watchable. Maybe I really missed what they were aiming for with Rad Chad's Revenge, I thought it was straight up unintelligible garbage, like getting a temporary lobotomy that lasts for an 1hr and 38mins. Avoid.



Tuesday 10/01/2023
Suspiria (1977)

Director: Dario Argento

Revisited this one with Emm; I love watching this kinda flick with someone who's new to it all, I never know whether they'll fall in love with it or sit there wondering "what the fuck is going on?" and "just why is it all so colourful?" Unfortunately Emm's opinion, as valid as any, fell in the latter camp; too slowly paced for her liking. Admittedly, it doesn't have a strong narrative, it's an interesting story, but you only get glimpses of a greater picture. It makes up for it by  completely oozing with atmosphere, style, and a hair-raising Goblin soundtrack. Essential viewing for any self-proclaimed horror fan.



Wednesday 11/01/2023
Eye of the Tiger (1986)

Director: Richard C. Sarafian

Checked this one out on Amazon Prime and it had such a dreadful transfer that I almost gave up on it, needless to say I persevered through and what I saw, I quite liked. I'm guessing it was taken from a shitty DVD source. It's a fairly good little '80s action film, starring everyone's favourite unhinged hero Gary Busey; supported by Yaphet Kotto and William Smith as the film's antagonist, Blade. Worth checking out while it's available on a streaming service, I wouldn't be too surprised to see this crop up at some point via Vinegar Syndrome as one of their a VSA titles.



Thursday 12/01/2023
The Warriors (1979)

Director: Walter Hill

At last! I got around to checking out the Imprint blu-ray which contains the highly coveted Theatrical Cut, be gone those blasted comic book inserts! I must admit I was a little worried about revisiting this as I'd not seen it for many years, I was concerned that I would find faults which I may have overlooked as a teenager. Mercifully that didn't happen and I can safely proclaim that love it as an adult just as much as I did as a teen. From the opening sequence to the beach showdown, The Warriors never lets up. Full of memorable characters, gangs, and action sequences there's rarely a dull moment. Watched with Emm who also dug it, "he's from Sex and the City!"
"Can you count suckas?" Five stars and zero bullshit.



Friday 13/01/2023
Smithereens (1982)

Director: Susan Seidelman

New York City? Richard Hell? Punk rock? Yes please! I truly wanted to adore this, unfortunately it is a little uneven and rough around the edges, which sounds punk as fuck, but when it comes to narrative and editing it's a little disappointing. An extremely low-budget drama about a self-centred chick who moves from New Jersey to the Big Apple to ingratiate herself into the NY punk scene with hopes to move-on to Los Angeles. It offers an interesting exposé on relationships and how people can parasitically use others for their own self-gain. Worth it if you're a punk and adore '80s NYC.



Friday 13/01/2023
Death Race 2000 (1975)

Director: Paul Bartel

Another film I've seen a few times over the years, only I feel like I don't talk about it as much as I should. It's a movie which I thoroughly take for granted and watching it this time around really reaffirmed and cemented my love for it. It's kind of like a demented and dystopian take on Wacky Races; laced with social commentary and featuring a fleet of insane-looking vehicles, each fitted with distinctive weaponry. Produced by Roger Corman for New World Pictures, Death Race 2000 stars David Carradine as the enigmatic and fan favourite racer, Frankenstein, and a very early role for one Sylvester Stallone. Essential '70s exploitation.



Friday 13/01/2023
Deep Freeze (2002)

Director: John Carl Buechler

Not to be confused with the pain relief gel of the same name, also known as Ice Crawlers, this is a super low-budget movie with its creative tendrils firmly rooted in John Carpenter's The Thing (1982). The plot is about a group of folk on an Antarctic base being terrorised by a recently unearthed and thawed giant trilobite.
Personal anecdote about this flick; I rented this as a teen with my dad from Blockbuster and we decided at the time that it was the worst film we had ever seen. It set the bar and become a unit for measure with our own ratings, from then on whenever discussing a film one of us hadn't seen we will say "it's not Deep Freeze bad". Watching it all these years later it's safe to say the movie is still hot garbage, but an enjoyable garbage and pairs wonderfully with pizza and beer, and hell, I've since seen Scare Package II: Rad Chad's Revenge.



Friday 13/01/2023
Shakma (1990)

Director: Hugh Parks

I'd wanted to check this out for a very many years after seeing it mentioned over at Jayson Kennedy's Basement of Ghoulish Decadence. Think I watched this via YouTube of all places and it looked like total shit. The movie on the whole is a good effort, a baboon is given experimental drugs and runs amok in after-hours in a laboratory, while the young scientists and their professor play a live-action role-playing game. There's virtually no suspense, the performances aren't the best, but once that baboon starts going ape-shit (pun intended), I don't know, I just really got a kick out of watching him chase and menace a bunch of teenage science-nerds. Will be searching a disc copy for sure.



Saturday 14/01/2023
Monster Island (2004)

Director: Jack Perez

I watched this via Amazon Prime in the early afternoon before going out for a bottomless bunch with the work lot. We got absolutely stinking drunk, drinking through til the wee early hours of Sunday. Monster Island was surprisingly good, a lot better than I thought it was going to be. Going into this thing I was prepared to roll my eyes and cringe aloud. Starring Carmen Electra, Mary Elizabeth Winstead (!!) and Adam West, the movie apes every '50s b-movie trope, but what I enjoyed so much about this was how it reminded me of Food of the Gods (1976) and Empire of the Ants (1977), schlocky giant insect movies of the '70s more so than those of the '50s. Good time to be had with this one, so check it out while it's still available on there.



Sunday 15/01/2023
Shock Waves (1977)

Director: Ken Wiederhorn

I woke up on Sunday morning rattling from a raging hangover, I remember going for a shower and desperately fighting the urge to puke, a battle I somehow managed to conquer. I decided the best thing for me was to put on Ken Wiederhorn's Shock Waves to balm my brain. A movie I've seen a handful of times prior, but couldn't remember all that much about. What I found is that Shock Waves might be the perfect hangover movie, it's so languid and oneiric that when viewed through an alcohol induced migraine-delirium, through squinted eyes and moments of narcolepsy that it becomes extremely difficult to discern between dream and reality, leading to a most unusual experience. Aquatic nazi zombies, Peter Cushing, and John Carradine, need I say more?



Sunday 08/01/2023
Evil Dead (2013)

Director: Fede Álvarez

Caught this at the cinema during its theatrical run and can distinctly remember laughing out loud when Mia (Jane Levy) bisects the Abomination's head with a chainsaw during the finale, much to my then-girlfriend's chagrin, and I'm still not tired of seeing it. I really enjoy this movie and I struggle to agree with any hate I see for it. It's an update of a stone cold horror classic, it doesn't have to better than it, it doesn't even have to rival it, and it certainly doesn't detract from the original; it's moody, it's bloody, it's Evil Dead, what more do you really want out of it? I prefer this to Army of Darkness (1992) any day of the week, sorry nerds.